Now that we are 25, almost 26 weeks along there is no hiding that this pregnancy is well…different.
In Minnesota, in the winter mind you, up to about week 20 I could just leave it at, “We are expecting a son this summer”…and no one questioned me. Thank you puffer vests, winter jackets and the left over “pudge” Teag’s pregnancy so kindly left me with 😉
We had V6 over this past weekend for dinner and we were all talking about our different experiences and perspectives when the topic INEVITABLY comes up now in conversation.
For Bryan, Brandi’s hubby, it’s telling people the baby isn’t his and then watching them squirm for a couple seconds (which is frekin hilarious!) before he explains. For Brandi and Bryan’s kids its telling their 7-14 year old friends that the baby isn’t their mom and dad’s. And for some kids they have to tell them the word surrogate and the definition for the first time. For Travis its being asked what crazy cravings I have had and responding….”Um, huh, I don’t actually know her cravings…” And for Teagan after yelling that Tommy is in Brandi’s belly to random strangers – they then look at me and go, “Oh well hi there Brandi, congrats!” Followed by Teagan yelling back, “That’s not Brandi, that’s Tory!” And finally, Brandi shared what its like to actually be the one pregnant on the last blog post if you want to read about reactions she is getting.
Considering I am now buying newborn items cashiers tend to ask a lot of the questions. So with that being said, here are the top 10 comments/questions that I now get asked on a daily basis.
- WHOA, DID SHE HAVE HER TO??? (Pointing to Teagan)
- *Belly Glance* Um, that’s nicccceee. (Like when you think someone is crazy when I say the baby is due in June.)
- How did you meet? (Followed by a look of horror/intrigue when I say we met on Facebook. I had one cashier at Target actually drop the bag.)
- Wow, her husband is so awesome for being so supportive/cool with this!
- Has she been a surrogate before?
- Does SHE know??? (Pointing to Teagan)
- They open up about their own pregnancy struggles, which is so awesome. I love how open the topic is becoming.
- Is the baby YOURS?? (What I know they are trying to say is, is this baby Brandi’s egg or not? And I know they mean well. So I explain how it is our egg and sperm. That technically Brandi is a Gestational Carrier because there is no genetic link between her and the baby. That a surrogate is technically when their IS a biological link and its her own egg.)
- That I am blessed beyond belief to have been able to carry Teags.
- They start crying and hug me.
So what is MY reactions to ALL of these questions?
I love the enthusiasm and all the curiosity people have! Like after an initial look of shock, people have that look on their face when they have a thousand things running through their brains. Then begins the FLOOD of questions. People are not shy at all. They go for it! They really want to know how it all works! Total intrigue. Utter support. Which if I can help educate and foster curiosity and support for surrogacy I am all for it!
The only downside to all the questions? Embarrassment about how long the line is getting behind me at Target or Costco. 😉 But I can live with that.
(PS…you know that big secret we have been keeping??? We will finally be able to share it with you guys around March 20 – 22ish…so stay tuned)